Some time ago I got an invitation to join Social Innovations Festival BiZzZ'17 as a speaker to present "Sidabrinė linija" - our befriending and support line for lonely and isolated elderly people in Lithuania we run at M.Čiuželio labdaros ir paramos fondas (MC Charity Foundation). You know, to share our experience, lessons we got and challenges we met, to discuss with the audience the social impact everyone of us can make in one of the easiest and simplest form - by talking. Just talking.

While browsing online for some supportive arguments for the discussion I came across the Harvard Study of Adult Development, run for nearly 80 years - one of the world’s longest studies of adult life! And the findings of that still ongoing study were quite shocking and really surprising, least to say:

“<..> our relationships and how happy we are in our relationships has a powerful influence on our health,” said Robert Waldinger, director of the study, a psychiatrist at Massachusetts General Hospital and a professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School. “Taking care of your body is important, but tending to your relationships is a form of self-care too. That, I think, is the revelation.”

Close relationships, more than money or fame, are what keep people happy throughout their lives, the study revealed. Those ties protect people from life’s discontents, help to delay mental and physical decline, and are better predictors of long and happy lives than social class, IQ, or even genes. That finding proved true across the board among both the Harvard men and the inner-city participants.

Those who kept warm relationships got to live longer and happier, said Waldinger, and the loners often died earlier.

“Loneliness kills. It’s as powerful as smoking or alcoholism” — Robert Waldinger

“Good relationships don’t just protect our bodies; they protect our brains,” said Waldinger in his TED talk (you can find it below). “And those good relationships, they don’t have to be smooth all the time. Some of our octogenarian couples could bicker with each other day in and day out, but as long as they felt that they could really count on the other when the going got tough, those arguments didn’t take a toll on their memories.”

“Aging is a continuous process,” Waldinger said. “You can see how people can start to differ in their health trajectory in their 30s, so that by taking good care of yourself early in life you can set yourself on a better course for aging. The best advice I can give is ‘Take care of your body as though you were going to need it for 100 years,’ because you might.”

“When the study began, nobody cared about empathy or attachment. But the key to healthy aging is relationships, relationships, relationships” — George Vaillant, the researcher who led the study from 1972 until 2004

Check here for a series on how Harvard researchers are tackling the problematic issues of aging.

That's incredible, isn't? However, the problem arises when a beloved spouse leaves an old (wo)man for a better place. Although I found the scientific "evidences" for a good life just recently, we have started our "Sidabrine linija" almost two years ago on exactly the same note: Loneliness kills.

There are more than 500 000 old age people living in Lithuania. Our society is aging at the fastest pace in the whole European Union and it is estimated by 2030 every third resident in the country will be older than 60 years old. All that has been followed by diminishing human and social relationship, loneliness, isolation and even bad health and poverty.

Based on the data from Statistics Lithuania, almost half of the population over 65 years old live alone, hardly 5% of them still work, up to 20% live in poverty. According to the most recent data from Global AgeWatch, Lithuania ranks only 63 out of 96 countries based elderly people living conditions.

„Sidabrinė linija“ is our solution to fight loneliness and isolation of elderly people in Lithuania: it is a free of charge be-friending and support line, providing information, friendship and advise to old age people. It:

> Offers regular befriending calls.

> Protects and supports those who are suffering abuse and neglect.

> Offers information, friendship and advice.

> Clears the air for the good mood and a better health.

> Empowers elderly people to overcome difficulties.

As of the end of June we had almost 1,000 registered old age users, almost 100 volunteers, all of them had more than 3,300 befriending calls and spent more than 100,000 minutes talking and enjoying the conversations. Living longer and better lives.

The most important and valuable feedback for us from our elderly people keeping us focused and motivated is the following:

"We have you been so long? Why we had to wait for 20 years!"

We are here to stay. Not because we all are ageing. But because of being part of it is our secret for a goof life. You can join us too - donate and help us to progress it further.